I hear you. When it comes to women and work-life balance, there often is no balance. I speak from firsthand experience as a physician managing a busy practice and a mom to three college-aged kids. Up until a couple of years ago, it seemed like my “me” time was virtually nonexistent.
But here’s the deal: You do need to carve out some time for yourself. We know neglecting self-care can affect both your physical and emotional well-being. A study published last October in the Journal of the American Heart Association, for example, found that women who reported the most work-family conflicts had the poorest cardiovascular health. I’m not surprised. When you’re struggling to juggle professional and personal responsibilities, key aspects of a healthy lifestyle, such as eating a healthy diet, finding time to exercise, getting enough sleep, and yes, managing stress, fall by the wayside.
This is a topic I try to address with all the moms I see in my practice. As a pediatric rheumatologist, I often take care of very sick kids. Their moms are on overload. I have to sit these women down and explain to them that if they don’t make sure to take care of themselves, they won’t have the strength, energy, and overall well-being to take care of their child. I’ve literally sent them home with a prescription note to take a shower, go for a quick walk, or even get a sitter so they can run out and enjoy a meal.
Oftentimes, the outlet that works best for these moms is regular exercise. It creates a rush of endorphins that boosts their mood and lowers stress, and it also improves their overall heart health. Another bonus: Since they’re waking up early in the morning to squeeze in a workout before the rest of their family is awake, they make more of an effort to prioritize sleep and get into bed earlier.
If you can’t commit to exercise as your self-care, that’s fine—I personally didn’t get around to joining a gym until all three of my children were off to college. Still, there are other ways to nurture yourself. When my kids were young, I focused on taking some time every day to do something I enjoyed that I could still do with them in the house—like read a book or cook. (They really liked that hobby!) Sometimes you can find something you’re passionate about and tote the rest of your family along as well. I have moms in my practice who use volunteering as an outlet and bring their children with them to work in a soup kitchen on weekends. Adults who regularly volunteer report better overall health, less depression, and, in general, more overall satisfaction with life, according to a 2018 study published in the journal BMC Public Health.
The bottom line is that you need to find something you enjoy and try to do it every day. Whether it’s for five minutes or 50, you’ll see benefits for both your mind and body.
