Memory Lapses: When To Worry

You misplace your phone—again. You walk into a room to retrieve something and forget what you needed. Everyone goes through moments of forgetfulness, but as we age, it’s normal to worry that these simple “senior moments” could be the sign of something more.

In my experience, there are a few quick questions (what I like to call a “self-evaluation checklist”) that can help you figure out if you’re dealing with everyday forgetfulness or something that might require formal testing. Let’s review each one.

Frequency: How often does it happen?

This is about the overall rate of memory lapses: Are you having one slipup a month versus multiple slipups a day? An increasing frequency (daily or near-daily incidents) can signal that something more serious than “normal aging” is at play.

What to ask yourself: Are my memory slips random (maybe once in a blue moon) or do they surface nearly every day?

Why it matters: Occasional forgetfulness is common, but frequent episodes (think: daily misplacement of items, repeated trouble recalling short-term details, etc.) point to a more persistent issue that may need medical evaluation.

This question zeroes in on how significantly these memory lapses are disrupting your everyday routine. For example, if you’re unable to manage once-simple tasks or find yourself needing extra help from family and friends to complete them.

What to ask yourself: Do these lapses cause disruptions in my day-to-day life? For instance, am I regularly missing bill due dates even though paying them was once second nature, forgetting appointments, or getting disoriented driving to places I’ve visited for years?

Why it matters: A single forgotten grocery list may be annoying, but it’s not always a sign of cognitive decline. However, if your forgetfulness causes you to routinely skip critical obligations (like taking medication or paying your bills), that’s a strong signal you should seek medical guidance. Essentially, if your everyday rhythms are off-kilter because of memory problems, the “impact” is high—and that elevates concern.

Repetition: Am I asking the same questions?

This drills down into a specific scenario that indicates your brain isn’t encoding the new information effectively, which can be a stronger red flag for possible dementia.

What to ask yourself: Am I catching myself asking the same questions (“When’s my doctor’s appointment?”) over and over in a single day—without recalling I asked or the answer I received?

Why it matters: This pattern suggests the brain isn’t effectively “holding onto” new information. We all might repeat a question if we’re preoccupied, but persistent, unintentional repetition can signify deeper memory encoding issues.

Routine tasks: Am I struggling with them?

This will focus on day-to-day activities that used to be second nature but suddenly feel confusing or require extra effort—like preparing a familiar meal or managing your usual budget routine.

What to ask yourself: Am I suddenly struggling with tasks I've done countless times—like following a simple recipe, balancing a checkbook, or using basic household appliances without getting flustered or skipping steps?

Why it matters: These activities are generally so ingrained that you barely need to think about them. If routine tasks now feel complicated or unfamiliar, it could signal more than just typical aging. When basic, long-practiced skills start slipping away on a regular basis, it’s worth bringing up with your health care provider.

If you’re scoring high on more than a couple of these, it’s time to call your primary care doctor. You’re not overreacting—the best way to stop worrying is to figure out what’s going on. When it comes to memory issues, the sooner we identify an underlying cause, the better. For certain types of dementia, early intervention can help slow progression (we’re talking about newly approved treatments and clinical trials). And if it turns out to be something else—like stress or a thyroid imbalance—you’ll know how to fix it and (hopefully) reclaim some peace of mind.

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